Star date on star base (ep. 9)

I enter the fitness room. Nobody is there. Thank goodness. I don't want to deal with anybody.

The medium screen display gives the air temperature. 61 Fahrenheit. 16 Celsius. Humidity 60%. Gravity 80%.

Trust your training, said the captain in his briefing. I was weightless in hyper sleep for three months. So I'm weak.

There are about a dozen stations with equipment & apparatus. My strength is measured at 50%.

The treadmill has straps that pull you down to simulate greater gravity. So I was lifted for less gravity. I need to regain strength & muscle mass gradually.

I chose the treadmill that faces away from the room's camera. It appears well-worn. Nobody wants a camera staring in their face when they work out.

Everybody likes to watch adventure treks on the screen facing the runner. I choose the Saturn program.

I spend an hour. I walk through the rings. I run past Titan. I sweat. I breathe heavy. I fall down but the straps hold me in place.

I run through the streets of the outpost. I imagine which neighborhood, which house Jacob & I will inhabit as we live happily ever after.

I keep expecting someone to come in & disrupt my solitude. Nobody does.

I go back to my quarters to shower. About an hour until duty. First assignment is always a trick. I want to be ready. My mind has relaxed.

I enter the command deck to relieve the lieutenant. I stand at attention but don't say anything.

Lieutenant is seated at a station. He says, "Come on in David."

He looks up into my face. His demeanor changes to one of concern. "What's the matter?"

He can see anxiety on my face. See? I can't keep a secret.

I respond. "I'm not sure. Nothing. It's personal. I'll handle it."

Lieutenant steps close & says, "No you won't. We'll handle it together. What's the issue?"

I say, "I got a video from Jacob."

Lieutenant: "That's a good thing, right?"

Me: "Yes. Well. I don't know how to answer it."

Lieutenant: "Let's see it."

I cue up the video & try to hand the micro screen to Lieutenant. He won't accept. He motions me to the center of the cavernous command deck.

He puts on the control glove. He swipes my screen to the big screen. Jacob's image is huge.

I ask, "Lieutenant. What about the camera in the corner?"

Lieutenant: "Remember your training. Every room has an acoustic dead spot. We're in it. We were in it in the galley.

"I played the music for extra precaution. Only you & I have a secret. Yours is bigger than mine.

"If we speak to the latitude axis, the camera can't hear. Facing to or away from the big screen. If we speak to or away from the camera, it hears everything."

Me: "What about the video?"

Lieutenant: "It's not porno, is it? It's in the system anyway."

Lieutenant & I don ear phones. Lieutenant points to the screen. The video plays loud like a movie.

"Hey David. It's been a while. Yo dude! Guess where I am. Flying by Saturn Outpost.They have a good soccer team this year. Should go to the playoffs.You should be out of hyper sleep by now. Beauty sleep. You need all you can get. Let me know you're okay. I miss you man."

Lieutenant: "I wish my name was Jacob. I see why you fell in love.  You know 'I miss you' means 'I love you' in bro-code.

"What's the problem?"

Me: "I just can't send a fake video. He will know I'm hiding something. He'll see it in my eyes. Hear it in my voice. You should know by now I can't keep a secret. I need to send him an apology & start over."

Lieutenant: "Okay. Apology has three parts. Say what you did wrong. Say why it's wrong. Promise not to do it again.

"What did you do wrong?"

Me: "You Sir. I did you. I hooked up with you."

Lieutenant: "I see. Why is that wrong?"

Me: "Because I'm monogamous. I promised to be. But I feel I betrayed his trust."

Lieutenant: "Can you in good faith promise not to do it again.?"

Me: "I can say I feel awful & want to rededicate myself."

Lieutenant: "Okay. He's definitely worth it. Let me think about it. How do you say 'I'm sorry I cheated on you. I promise not to do it again' in a sports analogy.

"Are you thinking, David? Alright. Try this.

'Hey Jacob. I'm doing fine. I'm so ugly, they let me sleep a few extra days for beauty rest. Ahh. Rumor has it that a Saturn soccer player has cheated with another team. If he promises exclusivity, the team will go all the way this year. I miss you man.'"

Me: "I'm not sure."

Lieutenant: "Let me try again.

'Yo Jacob. They left me in hyper sleep for extra beauty rest. I sure need it. I'm okay. First day awake.'

(To me) What's the name of your team's mascot? The team Jacob refers to."

Me: "Space Eagles."

Lieutenant: "Alright.

'Hey Jacob. I wasn't ghosting you. They left me in hyper sleep 3 days for beauty rest.'

"(To David) When you say this, look into the camera & show your anxiety, guilt, shame.

'Rumor has it one of the Space Eagles cheated with another team. He feels terrible. If he recommits to exclusivity, the team could go to championship this year. He feels awful.

'The food sucks. It's freezing cold. Lonely outpost. I miss you man.'

"How's that?"

Me: "That might work. I'll send it tomorrow. I'm on duty now. "

Lieutenant: "No. You will send it now & give your mind a rest. Take a minute & get it together.

"We have to be careful filming the base. Military secrets. We can use his final image of Saturn as your backdrop. That's romantic but not too obvious.

"Be ready when I get back from the head."

I guess that could work. I rehearse the lines in my mind. Lieutenant returns. He wiggles his control hand. I stand in front of the panorama of Saturn's rings. Lieutenant points the micro screen at me.

Lieutenant: "When you're ready."

Me:

"Hey Jacob. Thanks for your message. I worry about you too. They were too lazy to wake me up for 3 days. So just now sending this.

"Rumor has it one of the Space Eagles cheated with another team. He feels like shit. If he can maintain exclusivity the remaining tour, the team could go all the way to championship.

"The food is real but I barfed it up because of hyper sleep. Wasn't ready for solid food. It's my first day awake. Everybody seems nice. I worked out hard.

"Will send another message when something exciting happens. I miss you man."

I went silent. I just stood in front of the great rings of Saturn. Thinking about the outpost where gay marriage is legal.

Lieutenant: "Perfect. Send it to him. That's an order. Now! We need your attention here. Not a bazillion light years away.

"I have to go check on the captain. He might be sick. If he is, I will return to check on you. Remember your training. Study the logs."

I feel better already. I don the ear phones & preview before I tap Send. Preview plays his video again. Then mine. I seem to appear in his video at the end as he films the great planet.

I hit the head in the far corner from the deck camera. I feel weak & hungry. I see the food cabinet. It has real food & fake food in a tube. I suck on the tube.

I walk around. Check things out. The log shows my relief as William. At midnight. I hope he forgets about the pass.

You've heard the military slogan: Hurry up & wait. I'm in the wait phase.

Episode 10